~ Michel de Montaigne
Message from Dr. B. (Linda Paulk Buchanan): Have you ever wondered if you create misfortune for yourself that only exists in your mind? If you often feel unsafe, is it of your own making? For instance, do you tell yourself that others will judge you or dislike you without really checking it out in the moment? Do you overuse self-deprecating humor or put yourself down in front of others? Do you apologize unnecessarily? Is it that you think it is better for you to "hit" yourself first rather than being "hit" by the other person? Imagine the sad irony if they weren't of a mind to "hit" you anyway.
Sometimes we spend so much time avoiding risk to increase our sense of safety that we don't realize that we're creating an internal environment that isn't safe. Try to create an internal environment of safety by being more mindful of the moment rather than your assumptions. Or take it even a step further by telling yourself that you are safe, good, likable, smart, etc.